Day 34

Ah lets see where to begin some much has happened since my past update i don’t know if i will remember to put it all in here but i’ll try since the last time we talked dear readers i met somebody like me going through the same exact situation this boy i met is gay and in love with another boy who is bisexual this boy knows he loves him just like mine does these boys are both the exact same age difference as me and the boy i love this boy like me is also wiling to wait for the one he loves and we both still don’t know if the ones we love like us back in the same night that i met this boy me him the one i love with and a boy from the friend group spent the night down at my house hanging out playing video games and watching Netflix the one boy wound up going up while the other two stayed the night at my house but not before trying to sex up the one i love  so it wound up being three people on a queen size bed having a sleep over none of us really took up that much room with our sleep positions so ever thing worked out perfectly it was kinda hard being in the same bed with and not being able to snuggle him luckily my roommate was out of the house getting to know a gurl he use to know but never did anything with this girl wound up being his new gurl friend not even 24 hours after he found his wife and the ex of my friends mom doing the nasty long story short she moved in after we got his ex and her new boyfriend kicked off the lease my friends mom in the same day got together with one of my coworkers who is way younger than her mind you before they got togeather they acted like they never would like each other like that like it would just be a disgusting things to happen when really they had secretly liked each other all along so knowing this gives me some hope that my friend could love me back but not any high ones these two also now live togeather the four of them all in the same apartment building haveing their own little friend group since i last wrote on this site there have been its ups and its downs like the fact that i spent quite some time hanging out with everybody in my friend group which made me happy but at the same time a little sad and kinda pissed off when ever we all get togeather the one i love will practically sit there and flirt with two different people one who is a boy and the other is a gurl mind you the gurl is a trans bi boy and the boy is a drag queen gay who talks about being a trans gurl any who the three of them snuggled togeather but if i would try to join in i would be pushed out of it by the one i love he was perfectly fine snuggling up with these two  and it moments like this when i feel like he is disgusted with me or hates me i know my age isn’t a problem for him after all he has a mancrush on grant gusting and jackcepticeye there are more these are just a few examples  if i was two join in it became wrong it just shouldn’t happen there was another time when  i had just gotten off work after takeing up an extra shift we all went for a walk as a group and we stopped by McDonald’s after already haveing to see how he interact differently with the others practically flirting with two of them i had to sit there and hear him tell a boy who looked exactly like me just with glasses that he liked his hair then turn and around and tell me that even though we have similar hair that the other boys was better than mine and this is how things always play out he’ll find someone start talking about them and either i or somebody else in the group will point out that he just described me but he’ll go on to talk about how much better then me they are when everything is literally the same the incident at mcdonalds actually wound up pissing off one the people in the group but they didn’t show it they just told me later when we hung out without him they even said “did you notice how that boy at mcdonalds looked exactly like you only with glasses and he complimented them then turned and dissed you in the same sentence that pissed me off so much”but like i said it’s been up and down like that fact that on his birthday he hung out with me all day even staying up untill six o clock in the morning playing borderlands with me he was also really nice compared to how he usually acts and when i pointed that out to his sister who was trying to convince me to not buy him a present cause in her opinion he doesn’t deserve me or anything i do for him but because he was being so nice and actually going out of his way to hang out i decided to give him a birthday present even going as far as takeing on a extra shift at work to afford the more expensive version of what he wanted it i did all of this even though i told myself in 2016 i wouldn’t celebrate anymore holidays in other news you know how me and a couple friends were planning on buying a house for everyone in the group to share well everybody now knows about it because one of my friends mom decided to take a little snoop through her phone and see the conversations we were haveing about it luckily i managed to find this out so my friend changed all her passwords but the damage has already been done luckily my roomate took it pretty well but i that’s probably because they all think we were just making talk and going to be able to put anything into effect when we really will if everything goes according to plan we will have the house we plan on getting by april of 2018 and as longs as no one scoops it out from under us well there readers here is an update of all the important things that happenned in the last two months i hope i didn’t leave anything out i will try to make more frequent updates

Ps yes i know i spelled gurl wrong i spell it like that on purpose for the gbf movie i watched that everyone in the group has watched you should check it out i hope you love as much as we did also don’t forget to leave me any advice or opinions down below lord knows i need








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